I just felt different, and I’m not sure if I can explain it clearly, but I felt this deep sense of confusion. What is happening here? Where am I?
Let me tell you where I was so you can relate. I was surrounded by the same people I used to love very much and spend time with, even when I was on my spiritual path. I used to say that God gives you different friends and different circles as you evolve. I was so happy to find this circle, and I enjoyed my time with them during a certain period of my life.
But then, one day, after a long journey of healing and being away from home, I met up with them again.
For most of the time, I felt confused. I felt like I didn’t belong. I didn’t understand the conversations, and I couldn’t quite catch up with their jokes and laughs. How? Why not? These were my friends.
I drove home feeling heavy and confused. The next morning, I woke up early with the sunrise, and a bird was singing nearby. I made myself a cup of hot water, grabbed my journal, and began writing. I needed to understand what was going on in my mind and what emotions I was experiencing.
That’s when I realized—I’m in a different phase of healing right now. At this stage of my life, I’m continuing to filter my people and my circle. There’s no need for me to stay attached to the old version of me because she’s no longer there. She has changed. She has evolved, opened up, and become a different person. And along this journey, I need to normalize this constant process of change.
I will keep evolving, and my circle will keep changing. And that is something I need to get used to; it shall be a constant in my life.
I once thought that the “best friend” role could only belong to one person. But I was wrong. So many people in my life have become my best friends at different times when that one person wasn’t there.
I’ve come to realize that I need to be my own best friend. I need to be the one I can trust, love, journal to, and be with all the time.
I believe we are here to live and to change ourselves for the better. The goal is to become the best version of ourselves. If that means spending more time with ourselves, loving ourselves more, and changing our circles as needed—then yes, that is the path we should take.
I’m sharing this experience with you in hopes that it opens something within you and helps you accept the beautiful, cosmic changes that are unfolding in your life.